Lesson #48: WHEN YOU ACKNOWLEDGE WARMLY THE PEOPLE AROUND YOU (BUSINESS LIFE AND FAMILY), YOU CONNECT

Lesson #48: WHEN YOU ACKNOWLEDGE WARMLY THE PEOPLE AROUND YOU (BUSINESS LIFE AND FAMILY), YOU CONNECT.

(APPRECIATION TOOL LESSON ---- brings happiness to your life and your heart opens)

DESCRIPTION: People can be warm to each other every day. They can play and appreciate anyone and any situation. They can "see" each other. People are weak though. Their heart gets shut down easily every day by many situations that they "let" get to them and/or their ego forms opinions and that makes people blind. They stop "seeing" each other. They don't acknowledge each other. They make things important. When you make anything important, your energy goes down: If you make it important that somebody calls you very little, you get mad. If you make it important that somebody said a comment about you, you get mad. If you make it important that the police just caught you with an expired sticker on your car, you get mad. If you make it important that somebody wasted your time, you get mad. Humans are not perfect. We ALL have our LIGHT side and our DARK side. You can create a world where you "keep your power" and you just appreciate everything that happens to you and to everyone. No matter what is going on. You can acknowledge people. To be able to acknowledge people your heart has to be open. What opens up your heart? A baby, sunset, the wind beneath the trees, your sons and daughters when they were babies? Acknowledgement means to really see a person and mention out loud what you see they DO well. Once you have your heart open you can acknowledge. For an acknowledgement to really go into people's hearts, it has to be VERY SPECIFIC. There's is a great difference between "Good job" and "You sent that report on time and the client was very happy." or "You organized the team in a way that everyone gets to do what they like especially when you put your brother to do the financial reports that he likes to do". The person feels SEEN and feels good. Especially if you say the word "YOU" so the person knows very specifically that your attention is on them. Everyone wins because you opened up your heart to say these words and the person opened up their heart and maybe even giggled and expressed himself/herself how he/she does what you mentioned. They will probably do it more and with more zest in their step. The honor of two hearts are bonded. The acknowledgements have to come from the heart or else the person will feel manipulated. Some people think that by acknowledging something good, the person will not feel guilty that they did not do something else that they were supposed to do or not do. You can let go of the punishment. Punishing people is making them feel guilty. It's NOT that you give your "hand" and they will take your "arm" when they feel good with your acknowledgements. They WON'T take more and more from you. If you give feedback (Lesson #60) about what didn't work for you WITHOUT making them feel guilty AND you acknowledge them, you've got a team player for life on your team. If you acknowledge someone or do something for someone, you don't have to do it over and over. People might expect it but people's expectations don't rule. Your heart rules. You can keep your heart open and acknowledge again whenever it wants to. You can also give feedback to people from your heart letting them know what the game is, when and how things are going to be.

Acknowledgements SAVE TIME too. Do you really acknowledge people throughout your conversations? Even those conversations where you talk quickly to vendors, clients or family members? Taking at least a few sporadic moments more here and there throughout your conversation to appreciate them seems like a long time especially with all these things you have to do daily to get tasks done as fast as possible. When you say things direct, to the point and without a warm connection, you are wasting your time & energy. Without a warm connection there's a lot of explaining and aggression going back and forth. People have been "hit" since the last time you spoke to them. Their heart may be closed. You can say some acknowledgements first to connect and warm up. It's like "foreplay". He he! It takes MORE time to solve something if you don't take those moments to acknowledge. The conversation goes longer when it's a cold one. This LONGER additional time could have been saved with some appreciation and playfulness. It also feels much better. Acknowledgements save time and open doors for more money and/or love for you. You can also acknowledge yourself so your heart opens. I give you a game: you can say three acknowledgements a day for three days this week to three different people. They can be acknowledgements in person, on email, on text or on Facebook comments. Notice what happens! When you are warm to people, warmth will come to you from sources that you may not even imagine!

INSTRUCTION FOR YOU TO KEEP YOUR POWER AND FOR YOU TO SERVE THE TEAM SPIRIT (NOT A PERSON IN PARTICULAR):

Acknowledge people every day from your heart. Do not hold back acknowledgements because of an opinion in your head. Acknowledge yourself. Keep your heart open. Do not make anything important. Appreciate when things go your way and when they don't go your way. Do not punish people. Give feedback that makes them feel good instead of guilty or punished. Do not make yourself wrong if you closed your heart. Do not make anyone wrong if they closed their heart. Do not make yourself wrong if you did not acknowledge anyone today. Do not make anyone wrong that does not acknowledge you or others. Do not give them advice. Just observe. Give feedback if you want. (Lesson #56 / Lesson #73 & #74 / Lesson #60). (All this is what a toddler would do and as an adult if you do this you keep your connection and your power. When you follow these instructions, your levels of happiness & self-esteem open and you are open to receive.)


You are "in resistance" if you do any of these behaviors below. A resistance "leaks" money and/or love AND stops your momentum of your results, your adventure and aliveness. When you have a resistance or a mood, you block $10,000 of income. People create a memory of your reactions and behaviors and then decide to stay around or distance themselves. You don't have to keep everyone happy. It's not about that. It's about keeping the team spirit up in case you want to keep those particular people around (family or business related). When you drop these resistances (distractions), you have a better chance of becoming one of the 2% of high performers in the world. You can only drop these resistances with the help of your heart not with your mind.


All these resistances listed below create disconnection to yourself and the people around you. The ego is the one that wants you to feel small and wants everything to seem small. All these are when you are "in your head" where the ego is. The team "spirit" (of a business team or family team) goes down if:

• If you don't acknowledge anyone in your conversations.

• If you let anyone close your heart.

• If you close your heart on purpose.

• If you make anything important.

• If you punish someone and make them feel guilty even though you are right.

• If you have a "secret" revenge for people to finally see your success and you want to rub it in their face in the future.

• If you feel bad that your heart closed.

• If you feel bad that something is not going your way.

• If you make anyone wrong that does not say acknowledgements.

• If you give advice trying to make anyone acknowledge or open up their heart.

• If you don't stop to observe that they are just coming from a shut down level of aliveness.

:::: Basically nothing is wrong or right. It just is. This way you keep your power and momentum.

:::: PERMISSIONS OF THIS LESSON:

- You have permission to acknowledge the people you are curious about.

- You have permission to keep your heart open by saying acknowledgements to others and to yourself.

- You have permission to acknowledge people without caring what others think.

- You have permission to love everything and everyone.

- You have permission to NOT make anything important.

- You have permission to appreciate everything no matter what is going on or if it's going your way or not.

- You have permission to open up your heart and keep it open.

- You have permission to let go of the punishment.

- You have permission to acknowledge the good that people do and to give loving feedback.

- You have permission to say acknowledgements like "foreplay".

If you attach to the end result, your energy will go down. If you acknowledge warmly the people around you, it does not mean that people will be attracted to you immediately. It takes time to build trust and connection and there are many factors. You are "trying people out for your team". Not everyone will make it. Some are too addicted to pain and want to stay in the fight. You can let them go as quick as possible. They might come around later in a gentler mode but you can't force it. This is why there are 100 lessons. Please practice and study them all until the end so your connection understanding is complete. Please call Mariana Cortez if you have any questions on how to master this lesson (512) 636-8846 in the US. Sometimes it needs an "experience" to understand the lesson with your heart and playfulness instead of your mind. You have a free 30 minutes Language of Connection session over coffee or Skype with Mariana Cortez. Then any other day if you want you can schedule a 60 minute session for $60.



:::: SPECIAL EXERCISE FOR THIS LESSON:

"ROUND OF ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS"

When you want to bring up the level of trust and connection within the team or for some pressure and heaviness to dissipate so the team members can focus on serving the team spirit, you can do a "round of acknowledgements". You can call a team meeting so everyone comes in a circle. You say "OK let's do a round of acknowledgements. Say one acknowledgement for yourself and another one for the person to yourright". (Sometimes there is time for three acknowledgements for each). If it’s only two people, you just acknowledge each other.

- You acknowledge yourself for something you did well that morning or the previous day or week. The acknowledgement has to be very specific. Not general. It has to be short, not a whole story. And it has to "light you up". Start with "I want to be acknowledged for....."

- Everyone has to clap after this first acknowledgement and after every single one that everyone says.

- Then you acknowledge the person on your right. Very specific. What did they do that you saw that they did well? Start with "David I want to acknowledge you for .....". Address the person. Look into their eyes. Once you say it, watch the person to see if they "light up", if their eyes smile even if it's a second or two after.

- Then that person acknowledges themselves and then the person to their right. Etc... until the full circle is acknowledged.

- If an acknowledgement does not light up someone, point it out playfully, ask the person to say another acknowledgement. Some people like to acknowledge their self-pity and it brings the energy down. What you want is the energy up so the heaviness or pressure dissipates. If they get stuck, ask the next person to go and tell the ones that got stuck that you will get back to them.

- The acknowledgement doesn't always have to be directed to the person to the right. It can be random. You just make sure every single one gets acknowledged and lit up. And also make sure they do it fast after the clap and in one sentence. "I acknowledge ____________ for ________________ ".

Some people find it hard at the beginning to acknowledge themselves. Their heart has been broken so many times that it's hard to acknowledge themselves and to acknowledge people. This is normal. You are guiding the acknowledgement round. Just give the clear instruction that they have to say it as fast as possible. No long silences in between or the exercise becomes boring and low energy. Ask them to speed up in a warm way. Not with a sharp mad tone of voice.

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Every single lesson is a review of what I learned at Sage University (www.sageuniversity.com) in this particular topic of this lesson. Check out their calendar tab. You could go to Europe to take a class over there! Sage University has amazing workshops about relationship, leadership, salesmanship and entrepreneurship in Ibiza Spain (and everywhere including Bora Bora and Hawaii) where you can transform into that person that you were born to be.

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